A Quick Course in Parenting - Pt 3

And what great nation is there, that has statutes and rules so righteous as all this law that I set before you today? “Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children's children—how on the day that you stood before the LORD your God at Horeb, the LORD said to me, ‘Gather the people to me, that I may let them hear my words, so that they may learn to fear me all the days that they live on the earth, and that they may teach their children so.’” (Deuteronomy 4:8-10 ESV). The second principle in the quick course in parenting is to do meaningful things together. It's not enough simply to spend time with your kids: make sure this time is spent qualitatively. There are so many examples that I might draw on to illustrate this principle from my own experience! Perhaps the most vivid is the conversation I had with my oldest son, Kyle, while we were watching a baseball game of one of my other sons, David. It was years ago, but I have never forgotten it. With no prompting at all, Kyle said, “Dad, I’m glad you come to our games. We just play better when you’re there.” It was his way of saying that my presence was important to them. It was merely a matter of being together. There have been so many memories we have built through the years simply by doing things together. Playing family games together, going for hikes together, or building something together are merely a few of the things you may choose. The critical thing is to choose something. It will amaze you how many of their “firsts” you will experience with them. Each of these builds on the other to develop a solid foundation of values and principles of life. They become the markers of life. If a family really battles for what one psychologist has called "superordinate goals," the kind of unifying struggle for existence that once cemented families of pioneers, these help parents and children to pull together. Have you ever wondered why farmers' kids are so loyal to their families' goals? It is because they have achieved them together in an experience of togetherness. Whatever they achieved, they did so together. There is no better way to teach our children our goals and values than by being with them in the experiences of life. It is a principle that builds on the first we touched on yesterday. We need to spend time with our children, but that time should be used to experience life together. Develop a plan of doing things with your children. Even if your children are older, it is never too late to do meaningful things with them.