"A Family Like God's" (Part 6)

“So he got up and went to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' "But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate.” (Luke 15:20-23 NIV).

Today we begin the real meat of restoring grace and forgiveness to our families. In the June 22nd Morning Devotional, “Guarding the Low Places,” which can be found at www.gracerestoration.org/site/?p=377, I listed briefly ten principles for positive parenting. In the next few days I want to look closely at each of them. The first is: Never both be angry at once.

Perhaps the most essential element in our failure to extend grace in our relationships is that of anger. When we are angry, we simply cannot think clearly. Before you react, realize your feelings will affect your thoughts and words. I remember a time when such a moment was vividly painted in my experience. My oldest son, Kyle, found himself in a situation that required I come and pick him up from the custody of the local police! It was in the fall of the year, and he and some of his friends had decided to play a prank in a local neighborhood. They gathered as many trash bags of leaves left for pick-up on the curbs of the neighborhoods and placed them diagonally across an intersection, blocking traffic from going through any of the streets. It really was ingenious as they placed them in just the right spot to block the intersection. However, it was also dangerous and illegal. Arriving on the scene at 2:00 AM on a Sunday morning, I spoke with the police, and took custody of my son. As he got in the car I knew he wanted to talk about the incident. After all, he had broken one of the cardinal rules of the house: he was not where he said he would be and didn’t call to inform me he was leaving that place. Before he could say anything, I said, “We will talk about this later. Right now, I am too angry to not say something we would regret later. I am happy you are safe. When we get home, go to bed and get some rest.” I have been so thankful through the years that in that moment I could step back from my anger and just think. That experience has been a great step in the growth of our relationship through the years.

Today we actually chuckle at the memory of that night; however, I can assure you that it was not a humorous moment then! My first response when received the call was fear that something bad had happened and I was being informed to come and identify my son’s body! Then when I found out he was safe, but had broken the law in a dangerous prank, I was just plain angry. I don’t know about you, but I never think clearly when I am angry. Lot’s of bad things could have been set in motion that night had I reacted out of anger. I am grateful that time God’s grace prevailed. The first principle is never both be angry at the same time. Commit yourself to it and begin to practice it in your family.