"A Family Like God's" (Part 13)

In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. (Ephesians 4:26-27 NIV).

Today is a special day in our family. It is Kyle’s 36th birthday! So, first, Happy Birthday Kyle! However, I wanted to continue in the series of making our families like God’s family. Coincidentally (if there really are coincidences in following the path the Lord has given us) we will look at the eighth principle of in developing a family like God’s: Never go to bed mad. In our reading today, the apostle Paul wrote, In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.

I can honestly say that there was only one time in the last thirty-six years that I had an occasion to be so mad that it would be tempting to let that anger simmer and smolder overnight. Even then, I had the presence of mind to simply say, “We’ll talk about this tomorrow when I’m not so angry that I’ll say something I’d regret.” I suppose the key to that is in the realization that my anger has never served me well. Through the years I have learned how to step back in those moments more and more. However, in the early days of parenting, I am afraid that I was not so self-controlled.

Without spending our time reliving the specifics of the experiences that taught me this principle, let me simply state again that NOTHING good comes from discipline or discussion while we are not in control of our anger. So, let me make a couple of suggestions for those of you who are having some challenges in this area with your spouse or children:

 First, think. Think about the object of your anger. Honestly, are you really angry with your spouse or your child; or, are you angry at what has happened. Separating events from peoples always makes it easier for me to communicate on a different level with those around me.

 Second, recognize the incredible gift that you family represents. All of us have those special things that we would do anything to protect and keep safe. I still have the sweatshirt that I wore when I was a freshman at A&M with my squadron emblem on it! Forty three years is a long time to keep a sweatshirt! But, it is special because of the memories it brings. It holds incredible value for me. Yet, does it even minutely compare to the value of my family? You get the idea.

Like a campfire left untended, anger that smolders overnight can turn into a vast and destructive fire! Even if you do no more than agree to settle your differences at a later time, don’t let anger simmer in your home. Happy Birthday Kyle! Can’t wait to see you later tonight… Aunt Ruby’s coconut cake ala Brandy and lots of fun!