A Walk through Ephesians - Pt 22

 

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. (Ephesians 5:22–24 ESV).

 

Never let it be said that I refuse to “wade out into the deep water”! Today I come to the deepest water in the Apostle Paul’s letter. In the coming verses he will deal with the God-directed structure of the Christian’s home. It is a complex portion of the letter and has been abused and falsely taught for centuries. However, it is essential to the growth and development of the family. So, let me begin by saying our reading today does teach male headship and wifely submission in marriage, modeled after Christ and the church. This submission means a Christ-dependent disposition to follow the husband’s leadership, but it excludes obeying a command to sin or enduring abuse of any kind.

 

So, let’s take a look at some of the essentials of the characteristics of this “submission.”

Wifely Submission: Paul calls wives to submit to their own husbands as to the Lord. The word “submit” is not actually found in verse 22 as most translations add it as the verb. It is a continuation of the previous verse where Paul says we are to be in a state of “… submitting ourselves to one another in reverence of Christ” (v. 21). However, there is the addition of what this relationship is to look like in marriage. The apostle gives some detail.

 

First, he states the limit of submission. Wives must never follow their husbands into sin or remain in situations involving domestic abuse, as abuse directly violates God's law. And the husband's role as head mirrors Christ's leadership as a protector and provider. Of course, since husbands are finite and sinful, this headship must never be practiced in a tyrannical, domineering, or abusive manner. There is also a mutual imperfection where spouses are called to obey these roles even when their partner fails to act perfectly, pointing back to grace found in Christ.

 

Paul will have much more to say about how this relationship should work. Today, suffice it to say that it should look just like Jesus as relates in grace and love. It should never be positional, but relational. It should never be seen as a competitive relationship; nor should it appear to be a reference to authority or dominance.