Christian Homes (pt. 2)

 

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. (Epheisans 5:25-27 ESV).

 

Today we come to the role of the husband in the home. I think if I were to survey most Christian men and ask, “What is your primary responsibility in the family?” they would reply, “To be the head of the home.” My simple answer is to say that’s not Scripturally accurate. Jesus alone is the head of the family, just as He is Lord over all creation. I am not minimizing the staggering responsibility given to the husband. The apostle says he is to be the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. I do not in any way intend to disparage the need for godly, Christ-centered leadership on the part of the Christian husband; however, Paul says the primary responsibility of the husband is not to be the head of his wife, but to love her.

 

I remember the day Mary and I said our vows and became husband and wife 53 years ago very well. The photographer was everywhere setting us into place for “the perfect shot.” Some of the photos were reserved for after the wedding as they required us to be in the photo together and the practice was still common that the groom could not see the bride until the wedding began. One of those photos was the picture of our hands on top of a bible turned to the passage known as “the Love Chapter” (1 Corinthians 13). I did not know the full weight of that symbol then; and, I have been discovering more each day since. This I do know now: Love is the only means to a successful relationship. I am not “in charge,” neither is Mary. Jesus is in charge. My responsibility is to follow Him and love as He has loved the church, willing to sacrifice my life for her.

 

I’ve often shared an experience we had soon after Kyle was born in 1974. It was that moment when I realized the meaning of how God had given me my greatest treasure in life in my wife. When we truly treasure someone we will do anything and everything we can to protect and secure them. Now, don’t misunderstand, I’ve made more than enough mistakes in the doing of that. By no means am I saying I’ve been the perfect (or, even ideal) husband. What I am saying is that our focus, as believing husbands, begins and ends with the realization that our first priority is to love our wives. Recognizing this great treasure is the first step in that process. That kind of love brings trust; and, trust brings relationship.