The Path to Forgiveness - Pt. 3

 

Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3:12-14 ESV).

 

The second step in the path to forgiveness is an intentional, conscious decision to forgive. It can help to remember that holding on to anger doesn’t hurt the other person. It hurts you. Forgiveness is incredibly powerful. If it could be bottled, a daily dose would cure a lot of the ills of our society. The big question is how? It does begin with embracing what Jesus has done for us and extending that in thought, word, and deed to others is the essence of forgiveness. In forgiving one another, we draw on the forgiveness that Jesus has given us by making a decision to release another from the penalty of sin. Rather than drawing a curtain and pushing each other away, we push sin and judgment away and draw near to each other. Put as simply as possible, forgiveness is releasing the other from the penalty of sin so the relationship can be restored.

 

We should think about forgiveness in terms of this decision to release the way God has released us. It is forgiveness that means letting go of our right to punish another and choosing through the power of God’s love to hold onto the other person rather than their offense. In the process of forgiving, the first barrier you have to remove is within yourself. You have to decide to let go of the offense along with your desire to punish the offender. The bigger the offense, the more challenging it can be to let go; but the less you ruminate on the offense and feed your anger, the easier it becomes.

 

Understanding forgiveness as a decision to let go is important because we often confuse forgiveness with our emotions. Emotions are very unreliable. They ebb and flow which cause our anger to do the same. Just when we think an issue has been laid to rest for good, it pops up again. It’s a decision we make based on our worship of God to forgive as he forgives. God’s forgiveness isn’t a declaration of emotion but a declaration that his people are forgiven and pardoned from their sins just as a judge would dismiss a case from a courtroom. In that sense, forgiveness is a decision, a declaration, a once-for-all-time pronouncement. You may feel strongly the other person deserves to suffer. But you cannot control that. I suggest you begin simply. On a heart level, you don’t feel able to forgive. But on a head level, make a decision that you are willing to forgive. Open the door to the possibility.