Your First Love

To the angel of the church in Ephesus write: “The words of him who holds the seven stars in his right hand, who walks among the seven golden lampstands. I know your works, your toil and your patient endurance, and how you cannot bear with those who are evil, but have tested those who call themselves apostles and are not, and found them to be false. I know you are enduring patiently and bearing up for my name's sake, and you have not grown weary. But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first. Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first. If not, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place, unless you repent. Yet this you have: you hate the works of the Nicolaitans, which I also hate. He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To the one who conquers I will grant to eat of the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God.” (Revelation 2:1-7 ESV).

All too often I am faced with a couple who have reached a point in their relationship where they have begun to deeply question their love for one another. Their marriages are struggling. I often wonder if they will make it. One of the key questions I begin the process of restoration with is “Why did you fall in love in the first place?” Out of the deadness of lost love, you can sometimes see a flicker of hope that can be rekindled. From that recalled memory there is often a spark that can be fanned into a wonderful fire again. In our reading today Jesus makes this comparison in our relationship with Him. When we drift away from loving Him more than anyone or anything, He says [my paraphrase], “Remember how it was when you first fell in love with Me? There was joy, excitement, and gratitude for forgiveness, salvation and eternal live.” Then Jesus tells His church, “Remember where you have fallen and do the deeds you did at first.” What did a fallen Christian do when they came to Christ in faith and loved Him most? They wanted to be with Him, to know Him, to worship Him. It is a call to return to relationship. We do this with the Lord through prayer, Bible study, and worship. We do this in our marriages and family through meaningful communication, genuine listening, and equitable problem solving. Is your marriage struggling? Are you a Christian who has drifted away from the Lord? Remember what it was like when you fell in love and focus on what you did back then. The world is much different when you view it through that lens. It is always easier to overlook the differences when we are looking at the things that draw us together. Certainly with the Lord, and in our personal relationships in marriage and family, competition and the desire to be right won’t work. Return to the passion of your first love!