La Famiglia

“Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. And a person's enemies will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:34-39 ESV).

La famiglia is pronounced “faem-IHL-ya”. It is Italian for “family.” I heard it growing up often as my Dad would say, “La famiglia e tutto.” It is best translated as “the family is everything.” As you can see from the family reunion picture taken in the summer of 2016, our immediate family is relatively small compared to some other generations. And, sometimes we can drive one another crazy with our choices and behavior. However, the foundational truth for la famiglia is that you love them no differently. In most Italian families (as with many others) they will defend you to a fault, constantly protect and watch over you and always love you no matter what. At the end of the day, your family is always there for you. So, today’s reading seems a bit counter-cultural. In fact this statement is frightening; it is one that causes me to examine my heart to its very core. That is because I love my wife. I love my children. I love my grandchildren. Because of my deep love for my family, Jesus’ statement makes me very uncomfortable. In fact, it terrifies me. At times in my life this declaration of Jesus has caused some very difficult choices. You see, Jesus is saying that when it comes to our family members, Christ must be preeminent; if not He will be in no place at all when it comes to our lives. To some that may seem counter intuitive. As I have come to understand what Jesus is saying, this has made it easier to love and support my family, not the other way around. What is has meant for me is that regardless of how I may disagree with them, the example and action of Jesus drives me to love and encourage them even more than others. We hear a great deal about missions to the far corners of our world preached; however, the real mission begins in our home and family. They see the real person we are rather than the one we become in a group of strangers or acquaintances. I have known way too many people who claim to be followers of Christ and have such bitterness and anger toward their family they will not even speak. Can you imagine Jesus doing that? Me either. My Dad was right about la famiglia e tutto. How’s your family? If it’s in need of restoration, start today with a conversation of grace.