Sticks and Stones

 

The thoughts of the righteous are just; the counsels of the wicked are deceitful. The words of the wicked lie in wait for blood, but the mouth of the upright delivers them. The wicked are overthrown and are no more, but the house of the righteous will stand. (Proverbs 12:5-7 ESV).

 

I’ve often thought that the old saying “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” is a bit ambitious. Harsh words, name-calling, and insults certainly do hurt, especially when they come from people we thought we could trust. It never feels good to be insulted, even by a stranger. So our instinct is often to stand up for ourselves and to push back on an insult. People shouldn’t treat us that way, we think—and in most cases they probably shouldn’t.

 

I was taught this lesson of wisdom early in my ministry. While still a student at Texas A&M I was invited to preach the Sunday morning service for Reid’s Prairie Baptist Church. It was a small rural church about midway between College Station and Navasota. After the service I stationed myself at the exit to greet the folks and wish them a blessed week. It was a lovely experience, though somewhat surprising. The chairman of the deacons was near the end of the line of people filing out and he announced to me that they had a good week and my “stipend” for the day of service was left in the back seat of our car. He said, “The harvest has been very good this week, so we put two bags of vegetables in your car.” I thanked him graciously. The older lady who was last to file out was a very serous looking woman in her nineties. She had other words for me. She said, “Preacher, that was a good talk, but when you preach, you need to use the Bible.” I was a bit confused since I read several passages from a modern translation during the sermon. I lifted my copy of Good News for Modern Man and said, “I did read from the Bible.” She said, “That’s not the Bible. The King James Version was good enough for Paul, young man. I suggest you read from that!” Even though that was a bit hurtful, I learned that her intent was good, even though misguided. I ended up continuing to preach there for nearly a year and found her to be a wonderful, tender-hearted lady.

 

Our reading today points us in the direction of wisdom. It is always wise not to react with annoyance and overlook an insult. Of course, it is important that inappropriate and hurtful behavior is properly addressed. But this does not mean that the way to react is to fire back with the same kind of behavior. Remember Jesus, whom the prophets foretold would be “despised and rejected… Like one from whom people hide their faces he was despised, and we held him in low esteem” (Isaiah 53:3). Jesus was able to overlook hundreds—maybe even thousands—of insults, jeers, and rejections because he knew who he was, what he was called to do, and how much the Father loved him. Wisdom calls us to do the same.